“Do you want something heavy or do you prefer lighter books?” the librarian asked.

“It really doesn’t matter,” said the doll, “I have my car outside.”

Two modern youngsters were discussing the subject of piggy banks. “I think it’s childish to save money that way,” little Mary said.

“I do, too,” Annie replied. “And I believe also that it encourages children to become misers.”

“And that’s not the worst of it,” Mary exclaimed. “It turns parents into bank robbers.”

 

“You’re suffering from brain fag and ennui,” declared the specialist.

“You should take more interest in your business.”

“I would like to,” replied the patient.

“Then why don’t you?” asked the specialist.

“The law won’t let me,” replied the patient, “I’m a money lender.”

A young man was about to win a girl’s hand.  He ordered 2 dozens lovely roses to be sent to her 24th birthday. “A rose for every year of your life.”  But she refused to see him again in her life. The reason: The florist  in a generous mood threw in a dozen extra roses.

 

An army officer was fond of telling jokes. Once he came out of his room, and in the present of some soliders, told a lenghty joke. The interpreter translated the joke  in a single line and all soliders laughed.

The officer got suspicious. Later he asked the interpreter how he could translate the lengthy joke in a single line.

The interpreter said, “Sir, your joke is very difficult to translate. So i said merely, the General has told a Joke, please laugh.”

Lawyer : “This is the most typical ‘WILL’ I’ve ever seen in my life. You write that your                wife will be entitled to whole property, provided she marries again. Now,  what do               you mean by that?”

Client: ” Yes, I want somebody to be sorry that I died.”

A young lady came into a drug store and asked if it were possible to disguise castor oil. “It’s horrid stuff to take, you know, Ugh!” and she shuddered.

“Why, certainly,” said the druggist. Another young lady sat down and ordered a chocolate ice-cream soda. The druggist asked the first if she would have one too. With a smile she accepted the invitation, and drank it down with must gusto.

“Now tell me, how would you disguise castor oil?”

The druggist beamed all over, “Aha, my dear young lady. I just gave you some – in that soda.”

“But, good heavens, I wanted it for my baby sister!”

 

 

 

A Senior doctor advised his son, who has also become a doctor and is about to set up practise. “Listen, son, always write your prescriptions illegibly and write your bills properly.”

A physics lecturer was always immersed in his books, and would not come to the dining table easily. One day his wife remarked, “My dear, come quickly. Otherwise the soup, the curries, the fruit salad and the ice cream are attaining Thermal equilibrium.”

He came immediately.

“Beauty is the wealth of life,” says the artist.

“Wealth is the beauty of life”, says the economist..