“Why the apple for your trade mark ?” a client asked his tailor.
“Well, if it were not the apple, where would clothing business be today ?”

In a court -room drama, the plaintiff who was a sculptor, at one point asked the Judge in the frustration , “Isn’t this a court of justice ?”
“No,” replied the Judge. “Is it a Court of Law. Justice is an ideal like Truth or Beauty. As you try to achieve beauty with your mallet and chisel, so law is our tool in the pursuit of justice.”

An employer wanted to ensure ideal working conditions in his factory.
“Now, whenever I enter the the workshop,” he said, ” I want to see every man cheerfully performing his tasks, and therefore I invite you to place in this box any further suggestions as to how that can be brought about.”
A week later the box was opened, it contained only one slip of paper, on which was written, “Don’t wear rubber heels.”

A Jail lets its prisoners out to work every day to work for the local farmers. They are on their honour to return to Jail each night. But once, one inmate didn’t get back until the midnight and was scolded by a guard,

“Next time you’re so late, I won’t open the door.”

Excuse me, but I’m in hurry. “You’re holding that phone for twenty minutes and not saying a word .”
“Sir, I’m in talking to my wife.”

A newspaper advertisement says , “Farmer, aged 38, wants to marry a woman, around 30, who owns a tractor. Please send a photo of the tractor to the address given below.”

The teacher said to the children.”I hope that all of your children had a pleasant holiday and have returned with more sense than you had when you left.”
One – eager to please voice replied, Same to you, Madam.”

“What are you doing after marriage?”
“A Lecturer”,,
“And what are you now?”
“A Student”
“How is that?”
“My wife has taken over the lecturer – ship”.

A lady came to a store to buy socks. The counter girl showed her a variety of stocks. But the customer was not satisfied.
” Is that all you have? ” she asked, her voice showing disappointment. The clerk paused. “Yes, madam, ” she replied, except for the pair I’ve got on.”

The squire was given out L.B.W by the umpire in a village cricket match. “You need glasses, giving me out like that,” he told the man in the white coat on his way back to pavilion.
“So do you,” was the reply, “I’m selling ice-cream!”